Conquering the Cartwheels in Life

fear meme

My first cartwheel in I don’t even know.

Is there something that you used to love to do? That one thing you used to do it all the time and now you can’t remember the last time you did it. I am sure that you stopped doing it organically and then one day you realized that you can’t remember the last time you attempted to even do it.

One of the houses we had growing up had a large lawn that I adventured all over with my brother. If I wasn’t riding my bright pink banana seated Schwinn around I was cartwheeling across the enormous yard; at times making myself dizzy with the amount of them I did in a row. And then one day I stopped. I don’t remember why I stopped, but I do know what kept me from turning another cartwheel in my adult life.

Hello fear and doubt, there you are, telling me all of the reasons why I shouldn’t or even couldn’t turn a cartwheel at the age of 41.

  • I’m too old
  • I would need to use my rescue inhaler
  • I would fall over
  • I would twist my wrist
  • I would wrench my back
  • I would break my collar bone
  • people will see me try and possibly fail
  • people will laugh at me
  • people will talk about me

Typically if this was a task that I would seriously consider doing I would soon abandon the idea at bullet point three or four. But for whatever reason I became obsessed with trying to do a cartwheel just to prove to myself that I could in fact still do one. Everywhere I went I surveyed the area to see if I could maybe sneak a cartwheel in without injuring myself.

Yes, I even thought of doing them at the gas station, but decided against that because A, cameras and B,all of the breakable things, including myself.

Then on a sunny afternoon on the last day of September I found myself on the lawn of the Perry’s International Peace Monument with it’s level ground and lush green grass and I decided to talk myself into seeing if I could still do a cartwheel. To keep myself accountable and to remind myself I at least tried I decided to record my attempt on my phone in the broad daylight in the middle of the afternoon.

And as an OG blogging peep if I attempted to do a cartwheel and I didn’t share it on social media did it even happen at all?

When is the last time you attempted to do something that your mind or others have convinced you that you can’t do.

“If you want to conquer fear, don’t sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.” -Dale Carnegie

Fear and doubt have stopped me from writing here and really anywhere. I used to do it all of the time and then for no reason, fear and anxiety I just stopped. I have cheered on my friends who I have met through this space. I traveled around the country loving on, mourning with and celebrating with people I would have never crossed paths with if it wasn’t for my place here that got me started.

And just like that first cartwheel I did, these first posts aren’t going to be pretty. The flow will get better and I promise that I will learn how to stick the landing. Please be patient with me as I am learning where I need to go with my new old space.

If you need cheering on with something leave it in the comments and I will be happy to help push that fear and doubt away.

 

Feel free to share the image just give credit to @hdurdil

 

 

 

 

 

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Choosing to be thankful in the struggles

The year 2017 will forever be a year that I remember for a myriad of less than desirable reasons. Here’s where I confess that even with my positive attitude when you’re in the midst of the muck you can’t always see beyond the struggle you are currently engaged in.

I shared a lot of my daily life on Instagram so I could feel connected to the outside world. My feed was filled with face masks, inhalers, and doctor’s appointments. I shared my good days and I shared my bad. I wanted to help give a face to invisible illnesses. I wanted you to know that you are not alone.

I know I won’t forget the struggles of this past year and in a way I am thankful for them.

What do you mean you are thankful for your struggles?

The struggles in life help us to grow. They show us who and what are important. They help us to figure out our focus.

Between the struggles there was so much good. There was fun with family and friends. There were new adventures with and without the face mask. And of course there was lots of Vivien.

I look at my 2017 best nine and I remember the celebration of these moments in my life.

Nine moments that share the beauty of 2017.

 

The first time I was out without a face mask, even if it was for a few moments.

An all day outing with my granddaughter at the mall that left me exhausted but filled with happiness.

The start of my life with my husband.

My girls at my happy place.

Small trips and victories in my life that I just can’t put into words.

This past summer I read Anne Frank, The Diary of a Young Girl and this quote resonated with me.

“I don’t think of all the misery, but of the beauty that still remains.”

 

There will be misery and sadness, you will struggle. But in all of it look back and see the beauty that remains.

 

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A new year and a fresh start

One of my favorite things about welcoming a new year is putting up a  new calendar on the wall.  All of the memories that I have yet to schedule on the pages gives me a thrill.

As you plan out your year remember you can do anything!

“The secret to doing anything is believing that you can do it. Anything that you believe you can do strong enough, you can do. Anything. As long as you believe.” Bob Ross

Bob paints Leia a pretty little picture of a new life together

Princess Leia decides to leave her past behind to wander through the pretty little trees with Bob.

May your new year be full of believing while you walk through all of the pretty little trees in life.

 

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